Does a Break-Up Really Break Me?

As many have probably told you: “there are too many fish in the sea to miss one!”

But, honestly, that’s not gonna take away the pain anymore than pretending you’re “fine” does.

Break ups happen–that’s just the cold hard truth–but that doesn’t take away the feelings you once felt or even heal all the wounds made as a result of it. This “one fish” that you’re so caught up on, once filled you will joy, now haunts your every day life. Not to mention, the fact that everyone’s behavior is another clear reminder of how sensitive you are because everyone is treating you like a fragile piece of glass. You tell yourself you’re “fine” throughout the day, but crumble into a crying mess whenever something triggers you. You dress up nice and go out more, trying to catch some attention, and next thing you know, you’ve fallen for their trap once again.

Do not let them reject you anymore, clearly they do not cherish the gem that you are, so why go through the extra pain? Better yet, why are you apologizing to someone who clearly isn’t changing their mind? You were just being you, and if they do not appreciate that, then they are sure as hell not worth your precious time.

Again, people can tell you all they want, and say how you shouldn’t be “down” over this one “fish,” but at the end of the day, the truth is that it’s gonna take longer than just a few days–or even weeks–to heal from a hit like that. Those old sayings that your peers throw at you like: “time heals all,” can speak the truth in a lot of ways.

So, if you’ve recently found yourself cast aside by your significant other, don’t fret, and follow these tips:

1.You are allowed to feel whatever it is you’re feeling. . .just make sure you ask for support from your loved ones around you!
2. Take care of yourself. . .you always should be doing this, but especially after a breakup, you need to give yourself some extra TLC and treat yourself!
3. Be around people you love and do the things you love. . .this goes hand-in-hand with treating yourself, but it’s there to inspire you to get out of your room and smile a lot!
4. This event was a learning experience. . .so grow from it! Don’t give this person the power to ruin your future dating experiences. . .you are not “broken”, or “not enough,” just hurt from being vulnerable with someone who didn’t reciprocate.
5. Cry. . .let those tears go when they build up. You’re going through an emotional experience and it’s better to express your emotions than to keep them locked inside. If you keep things in, they’ll boil up over time, and explode like a volcano. The emotions you kept inside hurt more coming out all at once, rather than bit by bit over time.

With these tips, believe me, you will be able to progress towards getting over that person. If you start to dwell and droop over the old memories you had with that person, just remember that they’re not the same person you fell for. You’re missing the memories of being intimate with someone you care for–not missing the times that they ignored you or made you feel bad.

In the end, you need to know how to love yourself, for if you do not, or don’t know how, then how can you possibly love another? Focus on loving yourself first before loving another because no matter what the outcome of the relationship is, you’ll still be loving yourself. Yes, it might sting as time rolls on, but by you loving yourself, you save yourself from being lost.